Our New Normal – life with social distancing

Our new normal

Mourning the life we had

When we feel grief, it doesn’t always manifest in sorrow. I read something profound this morning. It was a quote I saw on Facebook that a friend of mine had shared. I have already forgotten the author’s name and I am paraphrasing here:

We are all in mourning…we are mourning what life used to be like…

There is so much truth in that. I recall the early days of my divorce in 2018 when several people gave me valuable advice. Two things stand out. The first is very similar to the quote above: In divorce, you are not sad about the divorce, but rather you are mourning the loss of the life you had because your new life is not the same.

The second recurring thing I was told was that the hardest thing in divorce is getting used to your new normal. Both of these ideas are born from the same notion that everything is different now. The same can be said for social distancing and living in the current world that is under assault from Covid-19.

Social Distancing = our new normal

Social Media as the canary in the mine

In the early days of the pandemic, as things in the United States were just starting to shut down, most of what I saw on social media was humor. There were countless memes addressing everything from relationships to toilet paper. That changed after several days. I began to see more hostile posts. More and more people were complaining about the inconvience of their situations. Angrier posts blamed Chinese people or New Yorkers for making things worse. Today, I have begun to see a shift in the tone again. Several people have shown sadness. There are some people who seem forlorn and confused.

This certainly reminds me of The Kübler-Ross Grief Cycle:

  1. Denial
  2. Anger
  3. Depression
  4. Bargaining
  5. Acceptance

Kübler-Ross Grief Cycle

If the comical memes and people like the President saying it was a hoax is denial and the demand for New Yorkers to stay in New York was anger, then it would make sense for people today to be depressed. Honestly, I felt depressed yesterday too.

Kübler-Ross Grief Cycle
At the time of this post, I believe we are in the Depression stage.

Depression is not a normal state for me. I have made it part of existence to avoid the trappings of depression. By living an active lifestyle, I obtain the endorphines I need to maintain a positive mental state and I try to eat in a way that reduces inflammation and the associated trappings that leads to. I have read and studied some Buddhist teachings and I used to meditate often. I need to meditate more.

But what comes next? As society enters into the bargaining stage, what form does that take? Will people start making unsafe decisions? Are we going to see packed churches? Schools opening back up? I would make the argument that we are already seeing that. We need to keep our focus and treat this pandemic for what it is. We need strong leaders with an appropriate message.

Click here to read about why I think Trump is the problem

We need stronger leaders

We need President Trump to incrementally make this worse. Up until today, he was claiming we would open for business by Easter. Now he has adjusted the timeline to April 30th. At some point, an adult in the room needs to tell the truth to the American Public…this is going to go on until long into the summer…this is going to be our NEW NORMAL!

Check out my daily rant on YouTube. I have softened my tone a little bit as I am moving through the depression stage. I will not bargain with my health, though…

See you tomorrow,

Chris

Pandemic Politics: Navigating Debate and Uncertainty

So many reasons, so little time

Pandemic Politics

I recently made the decision to unfriend a bunch of people on Facebook. For years I have kept ties with many of my social media contacts who had dissenting opinions to me. I convinced myself there was value to understanding how people viewed politics from a different position in life. The idea was that I could better convey my own beliefs by processing them through debate with these people. I am now done with that.

The current state of the world has altered things. Gone are the days of passionate debate and a desire to find common ground. Why? How did we get here? Who’s “fault” is it?

click here to read about kayaking during a pandemic

I think the answer to those questions is complicated. I would argue that it is actually a series of dominoes that have fallen to get us here. The following is my OPINION. Its just one person’s opinion and I am sure everyone else has their own. Remember, I am not a poly-sci major nor do I work in politics. Regardless, here it is:

The main culprits of our political divide are the following:

  • The 24 hour news cycle
    • When cable made its first appearance in the early 1980s, CNN splashed onto the scene, bringing the opportunity for us all to view the news whenever we wanted. As time went on, more cable news organizations came onto the scene. Competition demanded that news become more and more sensationalized in order to win market share and ultimately more advertising dollars
  • The election of Obama
    • I truly believe that a large portion of our society is inherently racist. In most people, it is latent. The average person is not going to say or do overtly racist things, but rather they exist in a native state of racism. It is common for many people to be fearful of black and brown people. It is also not unusual for people to feel that minorities are taking an unfair portion of the proverbial pie.
    • The election of President Barack Obama tapped into that inherent racism. I feel a large swath of people became invigorated by politics born from a sense of fear and that latent racism.
  • The Tea Party
    • During the early days of Obama’s Presidency, there was a coup of sorts in the Republican Party. The Tea Party was born of a desire from the base of the party to move the national agenda further to the right. They began winning local elections, then state elections, and ultimately finding their way into a smattering of seats in The House of Representatives.
    • During the debates of The Affordable Care Act, the Tea Party was instrumental in damaging public opinion of the legislation. Following that debacle, they further influenced John Boehner (the Speaker of The House at the time) into a series of grandstanding moves to stop budget progress. This took specific form during the need to raise the debt ceiling following President Obama’s financial moves to rebuild the economy after the crash of 2008.
  • Mitch McConnell
    • The obstructionist playbook was expanded by Mitch McConnell when he publicly stated, “The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president.”
    • As Majority Leader of the Senate, he was uniquely positioned to block every possible piece of legislation the Democrats brought debate. He refused to allow votes on popular bills. McConnell used a myriad of parliamentary maneuvers to block legislation on a regular basis. He is the epitome of the phrase, “do nothing politics.”
  • The Democratic Party
    • For their part, the Democratic Party also has some blame to share. On the national level, the party is actually quite dysfunctional. For decades, it has lacked a cohesive voice. The leaders of the party seek some sort of balance of moderation and progressiveness, all the while achieving neither.
    • The Democrats are wonderful at cannibalizing their own party. If a Republican does something untoward publicly, their party tends to close ranks and speak no ill will. The Democrats are far to quick to publicly admonish their own side, often making the party look elitist and fractured.
    • The Democrats have never seemingly been a single party, but rather a pack of people with 100,000 different agendas. Instead of building a coalition of strong candidates with a cohesive agenda, a hodgepodge of activists seem to drive the agenda and the message is lost in the noise.
  • The Religious Right
    • Somewhere along the line, the Republic party was hijacked by religion. I am unsure if it is actual ideology or the fear of public admonishment that scares candidates the most. Realistically, it is more likely that GOP candidates are the recipients of large donations by religious organizations and beholden to the marketing of Political Action Committees controlled by the same groups.
    • The Religious Right ultimately has two agendas in today’s political sphere: Stop Abortion and the dismantling of equal rights for the LGTBQ community.
    • The Social Conservative Movement, as it likes to refer to itself, is the main driver of public discourse for most people. It is hard to argue fiscal politics, but being for or against abortion is easy…and no one will ever change your mind.

Live and let live

So I quit. It is easier to give up on arguing with my friends. I tried for so long to be polite in my social media posts. I tried to ensure that I was using facts and logic to make my point. The biggest problem to arise from the current political divide is the phenomenon of Confirmation Bias. This refers to the natural disposition people have to only see “truths” in their own opinion. If they believe something to be true, they will only seek out information to support and they will ignore information that contradicts it.

On my YouTube channel today, I posted a rant about this very subject. Check it out:

Kayaking During A Pandemic

kayaking during a pandemic

How are you spending your time during this age of oddity?

If you are coming across this blog post years in the future, please note that this was written in the midst of the 2020 COVID-19 pandemic. At the time I am writing this, I am on day 8 since I closed my business at the order of Governor Cuomo. I have been filling my time since this started in a number of different ways, but yesterday I decided go kayaking during a pandemic. And I was so happy I did.

Before I go too deep into this post, I would like to address my absence. Several weeks ago, I began to post daily blogs. I was enjoying it, but after the second week, I realized that I wasn’t keen on the format I had chosen. At the end of the day, I am not looking to be an informational blog. My goal is to be an editorial source. I want to throw out my opinion on the news of the day, or a new movie, a video game I am playing, or whatever else suits my fancy.

click here to read about the original idea I had for the blog

So, going forward, I am going to do just that. I am also not going to hold myself religiously to posting each and every day. If I have something to write, I will write it. If I don’t have something I want to comment on, then I won’t.

The other piece of the puzzle is my YouTube channel. While I have never been successful at regularly posting there, I dropped it altogether when I decided to focus on this blog. I want to try to hybridize things more appropriately. One should not have to be sacrificed for the sake of the other.

The Current Pandemic Status

Today is Friday, March 27th. Over the last couple of weeks, I have created some new habits and my daily routine has changed drastically. While I still get up at 6 or 7 am, I no longer have ninety minutes of bookkeeping and other administrative tasks to do. Now, I make my coffee, turn on my Nintendo Switch, and play Animal Crossing. At some point, Governor Cuomo goes live with a press conference in which he outlines the current state of things. After my coffee is done, I either ride my bike on the trainer or run on the treadmill.

Yesterday, the weather was quite nice, so I got the chance to change things up. I followed the same routine until Cuomo finished his press conference. Instead of hitting the gym, I went to my garage and took out the patio furniture and the fire pit. I also put the bike rack and kayak mounts on the Subaru. When all that was accomplished, I loaded my 14 foot kayak onto the car and went to The Erie Canal Park in Camillus.

People Out in Force

I was shocked when I arrived by how many people were there. In my YouTube video, I claim there to be around 50 people. That was a gross underestimate. By the time I left, I am certain I saw well over 100 people there. During this crisis, we are being asked to “Social Distance” from others, meaning to keep six feet away from the person near you. The width of the trail at the park does not allow that. Luckily for me, I was nowhere near anyone because I was in the water.

I needed to get out. As I could tell from the size of the crowd, other people needed to as well. How do you condemn people for congregating in that way, whether there is a pandemic or not? They were not there to socialize. They went to the park to get outdoors and exercise. Endorphines are the best defense against stress in times like this. I would make the argument that the risk is worth the reward.

My girlfriend Jessica and I also took our bikes out at the lake last night. That was really nice too and the crowds were much smaller there. I am thinking an outdoor run is on the docket today. I guess you will find out tomorrow.

Do me a favor: subscribe to this blog. You can find the subscription box on the right sidebar if you are on your computer or at the bottom of the page if you are on a mobile device. Subscribe to my YouTube Channel while you are at it. Hopefully I will get back into the swing of all this.

See you tomorrow…